Author: Capital Catholic Happenings

Wounded hearts: bitter or blessed

We all have heard the stories about the failure of the Church to adequately address the sexual misconduct with minors by some in ministry. Let’s be clear, one act of sexual misconduct with a child is abhorrent. And, there have been failures. But there is another story I want to tell. I want to talk about what the Archdiocese of Washington is doing right for the victims of abuse and for the parishes which have suffered.

 Help for victims

We have an office of Child Protection Services. A person who has been harmed can pick up the phone and call the director. She works closely with victims to help them move towards healing and recovery from their experience. The director also investigates allegations that come to the attention of the office or archdiocese. Finally, this office coordinates the training that all clergy, and any adult who works or volunteers with children in any of our programs, is required to take. Over the past seven years alone, we have trained at least 38,000 adults who now can put what they have learned to work, not only in our parishes, schools and organizations, but also in their homes, workplaces and the community. Today, the archdiocese makes a huge contribution to keeping kids safe, both inside and outside of the church.

 We not only respond to individuals who come forward, but we also often work with a parish where the priest or deacon served because the pain often extends to the  larger community of faith. When a credible allegation or a criminal charge is made, the archdiocese puts together a team of people to work with a parish to provide the resources it needs to cope.

 Our pastoral response seeks to open up pathways to transformation. Firstly, we are one church and so the team goes to the parish to pray and work with the pastor or pastoral council leadership on a pastoral response that will be right for this particular community. Secondly, our response includes presence. We are present to communicate support and to plan a time for the parish to come together to pray; for the victims, known and unknown; for the parish community; for the accused and for the guiding force of God’s love. Thirdly, we develop a communications plan. In crisis situations, it is so important that people know the facts and have accurate, clear and compassionate communication. Fourthly, our experience has made it possible to provide a rich diversity of resources. In some cases parents are looking for talking points so that they can explain the situation to children and talk with them openly. In other cases, people want to learn more about suffering, forgiveness and reconciliation.

 Announcements about what happened typically are made at Masses. Members of our team are present at all of the Masses. We come prepared to listen, to answer questions and to provide immediate support if someone were to come forward with an additional allegation. I have been on these teams and I was prepared (or at least as prepared as one can be when you don’t know what to expect) to hear that someone in the room may be a victim.  What I was not prepared for is that people feel a need to share their own experience of sexual abuse, not by a priest or church employee, but rather by other people in their lives. The situation in which they find themselves now brings back all of the hurt of their own experience, confusion and sadness.

 It is painful, but I am so grateful that my role is to help the parish community find ways to work through the experience by drawing on the church’s spiritual gifts and resources. I believe that in the face of the enormity of the sin and a wounded community, it is grace that will see the victims, parishioners and parish through such a dark night. I recently heard a speaker who referred to the choice made by a wounded heart as being bitterness or blessing. That captures exactly what my experience has been in the two parishes in which I have assisted.

 It is very easy to understand how pain can be overwhelming, but the great gift the church can bring to the situation is the gift of blessedness. The church can offer the hope that the broken hurt can be transformed and can walk with those affected through that transformation.

 A transforming love

For a parish hurting, that may not always seem possible, but I have seen the transformation. There comes a time when a parish that is hurting is ready for an experience of God’s transforming love and to see that forgiveness and healing is possible. One approach is a retreat, when parishioners can begin the process of reconciliation and forgiveness. In prayer, in sharing individual experiences, they find a new found strength; they can identify obstacles to healing and reconciliation. They discover evidence of a new life that can only come through God’s healing touch.

 One parish I worked with that was deeply wounded, three years later can point to a new spiritual vitality that is an experience of transformation. It is the story of a community that again found blessing, not bitterness and hope, not despair.

Fr. Carter Griffin, Parochial Vicar at St. Peter’s on Capitol Hill shares with us a first-hand account of the Consistory.

Saturday, November 20

The day began for the priests and seminarians of Washington with a Mass celebrated by Cardinal-designate Wuerl at the Pontifical North American College.  The NAC, as it is sometimes called, is where men are prepared in Rome for service to dioceses in the United States, and will serve as a “hub” for several events surrounding the Consistory.

Under a cloudy sky, Washington pilgrims made their way from their hotels to St. Peter’s square to arrive early for the 10:30 Consistory.  Unfortunately, there were far more tickets provided to pilgrims than the Basilica could accommodate, so by 8:30 am the church was full.

Rain, and then thunderclouds, rolled over the Vatican, serving as a dramatic audible backdrop to the Consistory.  The twenty-four Cardinal-designates processed to their seats in a semi-circle around the main altar, followed by the Holy Father and his masters of ceremonies.  After introducing the sacred rites and those who were to be made Cardinals, the Pope listened to an address by Archbishop Angelo Amato, the Prefect of the Congregation for the Causes of Saints and one of the Cardinal-designates.  Speaking on behalf of all the soon-to-be Cardinals, Archbishop Amato noted that the men surrounding him were from different geographic regions, had walked different paths in the priesthood, and were engaged in different ministries on behalf of the Church, but all of them were united in the same faith in the Triune God and in their obedience to the successor of Peter.

The Scriptural readings followed, notably the Gospel in which the apostles James and John ask Jesus to place them at His side in the Kingdom of Heaven.  In reflecting on this Gospel passage, the Holy Father observed that Jesus took advantage of the opportunity to explain to his apostles the meaning of true greatness in the Church.  James and John, Jesus teaches, were looking for honor and for greatness according to the standards of the world.  He lifts their eyes to a higher vision of discipleship, inviting them to follow Him by giving themselves entirely to the will of God the Father, by serving their brothers and sisters without reservation.  The Pope continued that ministry in the Church must follow this “new logic, this new model” of greatness, which is the logic of servanthood.  He who would be first, as Jesus explains, must be a servant, must be the slave of all.  Thus the aim of ministry is not to fulfill one’s own will or to satisfy one’s own ambition, the Pope continued, but to fulfill the will of God the Father as Jesus Himself did.

In concluding his homily, the Holy Father asked for prayers for the new Cardinals who were being entrusted with a particular new ministry in the Church.  He reminded everyone present that tomorrow, on the Feast of Christ the King, he will bestow on each of them a special ring that will be a sign of their fidelity, a sign of their willingness to follow Jesus to the Cross even, if necessary, at the cost of their own blood, symbolized by their new red vesture.

Following the homily, the new Cardinals professed their faith in the Nicene Creed and affirmed their fidelity to the teachings of the Church and to the successor of St. Peter.  Each was then presented to the Pope in person, who placed on their heads their red zucchettos and birettas, the “red hats” that are worn only by Cardinals.  At the same time, the Holy Father announced which parish in Rome would be designated as each Cardinal’s “titular church”, the church for which he would be particularly responsible and which associates him in a concrete way with the Diocese of Rome and the ministry of the Pope.

To the joy of everyone in our pilgrimage group, Cardinal Wuerl received as his titular the ancient and beautiful basilica of Saint Peter in Chains (San Pietro in Vincoli) near the Roman Forum and which contains, according to tradition, the chains that bound St. Peter when he was imprisoned in Jerusalem as well as those from his imprisonment in Rome – the two having miraculously fused together when Pope Leo I held them together.  The fifth-century church makes tangible in a striking way Cardinal Wuerl’s new relationship to Rome, to the Pope, and indeed to the titular church’s own patron, St. Peter himself.

Following the ceremony in St. Peter’s Basilica, Cardinal Wuerl and the pilgrims from Washington and elsewhere him made their way to the North American College for a reception in which His Eminence was able to greet his visitors.

Finally, later in the afternoon all the new Cardinals returned to the Vatican, either in the Apostolic Palace or in the Paul VI Auditorium, to greet their visitors and all the well-wishers from Rome who wished to meet them.  One young married couple, both Americans who live in Italy, had a particular reason for gratitude: they first met each other at a Theology on Tap in which Cardinal Wuerl spoke some four years ago!  Greeting hundreds more people, Cardinal Wuerl – with great fortitude after such a long day! – remained in his place to see all those who had traveled far and wide to see the new Cardinal Archbishop of Washington.

In the course of these visits in the Paul VI Auditorium, the Cardinal expressed his deep appreciation for the prayers not only of those accompanying him to Rome, but of those who could not come, and his desire to join with their prayers in thanksgiving for the great blessings bestowed today on the Archdiocese of Washington.

Reading of the Biglietto from Rocco Palmo on Vimeo.

Friday, Cardinal-designate Wuerl was on the job in his new role as Cardinal as he participated in a meeting with Pope Benedict XVI. A wide range of topics were discussed. One topic the Cardinal-designate found very interesting was the one on religious freedom both from an international perspective and a local perspective. Cardinal-Wuerl said the discussion about religious freedom is particularly important, not only because Christians face violence in places like Iraq, but also because of threats in increasingly secular societies like the United States “where faith-based organizations are told they can’t carry out their activities according to their own conscience.”  Read the whole article from Catholic News Service. It is a good preview of the kinds of issues on which Pope Benedict will be seeking advice.

There was also time for celebration as more than 200 family and friends gathered at a restaurant near the Vatican for supper and a song written for Cardinal-designate Wuerl,just for this occasion, and sung by the Archdiocese of Washington seminarians studying in Rome. If you have ever visited Piazza Navona in Rome, surely you heard a group singing “Volare…” As they say, when in Rome do as the Romans and indeed that was the melody of the evening!