Community in Mission

In this month of All Souls, it is good to reflect on funerals. It concerns me that very few people today seem to understand the real purpose of a funeral. The way in which we conduct ourselves at funerals, the manner of preaching at funerals, and other visible attitudes expressed at funerals not only teach poorly, but are often a countersign of biblical and Church teaching on death, judgment, Heaven, and Hell.

There are many problems, both sociological, and liturgical, that combine to create an environment that not only obscures Catholic teaching on death, but often outright contradicts it.

In today’s post, I would like to lay out what I think are some of the issues that surround typical funerals today. I do not claim that every family or parish exhibits all or even any of these problems, only that they are common.

1. There is basic confusion about the purpose of a funeral. Many people arrive at the parish to plan a funeral, presuming that the funeral should be all about “Uncle Joe,” who he was, what he liked, etc. This leads to a series of requests, some of them inappropriate. For example,

1. Uncle Joe’s favorite song was My Way, so we want a soloist to sing it at the funeral.
2. Uncle Joe had three favorite nieces who would each like to speak after Communion to say “a few words” about what a great uncle he was.
3. Uncle Joe was a big football fan; he never missed a game. So we’d like to have flowers in the team colors and a football displayed on a table near the altar. We received a letter from the team’s front office and we’d like to have it read in tribute after Communion (after the nieces).
4. Father, in your sermon please remember to mention Joe’s great concern for such-and-such cause. Oh, and don’t forget to mention that he was a founding member here at St. Esmerelda’s and was the president of the parish men’s club.

Well, you get the point. Of course none of this is the real purpose of a funeral at all. Like any celebration of the Sacred Liturgy, the Funeral Mass is primarily for the worship of God, the proclamation of the Gospel, and the celebration of the paschal mystery. Secondarily, the Mass is offered for the repose of the soul the deceased, inviting prayer for the judgment he faces and for his ultimate and happy repose after any necessary purification.

The sacred liturgy exists to glorify God, not man; to praise the Lord, not Uncle Joe. No matter how great a guy Uncle Joe was, he doesn’t stand a chance if not for Jesus and lots of grace and mercy. Uncle Joe needs prayer more than he needs praise. Whatever gifts he did have were from God. God should be thanked and praised for them.

Too many funerals focus on man, not God. Too many funerals focus on human achievements rather than the need for grace, mercy, and gratitude for all that has been received.

As a practical matter, in my parish we do not allow relatives or friends to speak during the Funeral Mass. If someone wants to say a few words, it is done before Mass starts. Once the Funeral Mass begins, though, it is the Mass and only the Mass.

2. A step is skipped at most funerals. Upon the death of a loved one there is often the instant declaration that “He’s in Heaven now.” Sometimes it’s worded a little differently: “She’s in a better place” or “He’s gone home.”

Of course such statements are grossly presumptive and in making such declarations, people attempt to sit in the judgment seat that belongs only to Jesus. If I were to say, “Uncle Joe is in Hell now,” people would be justifiably angry and accuse me of being “judgmental.” But of course those who say “Uncle Joe is in Heaven now” are doing the very same thing.

Further, Scripture doesn’t teach that people, even believers, die and go straight to Heaven. No, there is little “pit stop” first, an appointment to keep. Scripture says,

1. It is appointed for man to die once, and after that comes judgment (Hebrews 9:27).
2. For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil (2 Cor 5:10).
3. Always speak and act as those who are going to be judged under the law of liberty (James 2:13).

Thus instant promotion of the deceased to the realm of Heaven is inappropriate. Instead, we should give them to the Lord with our prayers, asking for a merciful and kindly judgment, and that any necessary purification be accomplished soon. The prayers for, and comments about, the deceased can include gratitude for their life and the gifts they brought. But we should never to fail to mention that the deceased goes to judgment and that we should pray for them, more than praise them.

3. Purgatory and the concept of purification after death are rarely mentioned at funerals, but should be. Purgatory is the likely destination of most of the dead, for at least some purification after death.

The whole point of praying for the dead is Purgatory! If the dead are in Heaven, then they don’t need our prayers. Sadly, if they are in Hell, they can’t use them either. It is those in Purgatory who both need and can use our prayers.

Jesus said, You must be perfect as the Heavenly Father is perfect (Mat 5:41). This is a promise, not a threat. And St. Paul said, May God who has begun a good work in you bring it to completion (Phil 1:16).

Most of us know that we are not perfect and that God’s work in us in not complete. If we were to die today, God would still have some work to do in us. Purgatory just makes sense; clergy ought not to be so hesitant to preach it clearly, particularly at funerals. We are not just here to pray for the family; we are here to pray for the deceased because he or she has gone to judgment. Even if the judgment isn’t for Hell (thanks be to God), there is almost certainly some finishing work needed, some purgation; our prayers make a difference in this regard.

4. The immediate family should not be the only object of concern and ministry at a funeral. While every priest and deacon who preaches is aware that a funeral is a sensitive moment for the family, he cannot minister only to them. Present at most funerals (in great abundance, frankly) are many who are unchurched and need to be called to Jesus. Often some of these people are in the immediately family of the deceased.

Clergy should not let this opportunity pass. The only time many of us see a lot of these people is at funerals. Waiting for “another time” to call them to repentance and to follow Jesus should not be an option. They are here now and must be called now.

At the Funeral Mass we clergy should seek to minister not only to the immediate family, but to all in attendance who are in varying states of spiritual health or disease.

Pastoral experience tells me that the overwhelming majority of attendees at funerals are in grave spiritual condition. Most of them are not serious about their spiritual life. They are not praying; they are not reading Scripture. They are not attending Mass or going to any service on Sundays. Many are in very serious and unrepentant mortal sin.

To have that many lost souls at a funeral and to say nothing at all to them about the need to repent and call on Jesus, is downright malpractice on the part of the clergy. Whether they like it or not, priests are watchmen for the house of Israel. They must go on ahead of the Judge to summon people to repentance and saving faith.

This can be and should be done at funerals. It is possible to do so with loving conviction and a passionate cry.

I have done this for many years at funerals and have almost never received complaints. On the contrary—I have received many expressions of gratitude from people who are desperate for their wayward relatives to hear such a message. I have also joyfully received back into the practice of the faith a number of people as a result of such preaching.

We must minster to everyone at funerals. They are moments that are pregnant with meaning and possibilities. They are evangelical opportunities.

It is generally agreed that things are out of balance at most Catholic funerals. Our silence about important matters such as judgment, Purgatory, and proper preparation for death makes a good deal of what we do unintelligible. Why are we offering Mass? Why do many of our prayers ask for mercy and beseech the Lord to received our deceased loved one into Heaven? If it’s all certain and perhaps even a done deal (e.g., Joe is already “in a better place”) why do we do any of this at all?

The priest should surely speak with confidence about the love and mercy of God, assuring the family in this regard, especially if the deceased had faith. The Lord Jesus loves sinners and died for us. Surely He will have mercy on those who seek it.

But God’s mercy cannot be preached without reference to human freedom and choice. Neither can judgment be understood without reference to the promise of perfection and the need for it before we can enter Heaven. Regarding Heaven, Scripture says, Nothing impure will ever enter it (Rev 21:27). The denizens of Heaven are described as the spirits of the righteous made perfect (Heb 12:23). And we are admonished, Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord (Heb 12:14).

All of these notions must balance and frame our discussion of mercy and the confident hope that we can give our loved ones back to God.

But too many Catholic funerals lack this balance. This lack is on the part of both the families, who often speak of salvation without reference to judgement, grace, or mercy; and the clergy, who often fail to preach in a way that sets forth a clear teaching on death, judgment, Heaven, (Purgatory), and Hell.

On Wednesday I will post a sermon typical of what I preach at funerals. If I do say so myself, it tries to articulate all of these themes.

The commercial below is a good illustration of a description of reality supplied by St. Paul.

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the higher realms (Ephesians 6:10-12).

As the video opens we see a man and woman approaching each other, each surrounded by cartoonlike demons. I call them demons because although they appear to be “cute” they are nothing of the sort. Like the biblical “wolves in sheep’s clothing,” they are influencing the two humans in the video in a hidden but very real way. Demons surely do this to all of us, tempting us to sin and seeking to influence our thoughts and actions. The two people in the commercial seem oblivious to the presence of these creatures, just as we are often unaware of the demons who seek to influence us.

When they meet, the man and woman confront each other with hostility. St. Paul would remind us that they ought to set aside their petty “turf war” and realize that they are being manipulated by dark forces from higher realms.

But they do not do so; much as we often do, they begin to fight.

In a moment of revelation, though, they both see their common enemy and join forces against him. There’s an old saying, “Warring brothers reconcile when there is a maniac at the door.”

As St. Paul says, our battle is not so much against one another, but against powers and dark forces from higher realms. Would that we could all see this more clearly.

Scripture is a prophetic declaration of reality; it tells us what is really happening. Enjoy this brief depiction of an archetypal biblical teaching. Even if the commercial’s creators did not intend to convey this understanding, the eyes of faith can see it.

https://youtu.be/uIFHLYtP7pM

In the aftermath of the recent election, our country and our parishes are divided. Some people are hurt and angry while others are jubilant and hopeful. But although we often square off in opposing corners and stare fearfully at each other, we should remember our common enemy, the Devil. There’s a saying that warring brothers reconcile when there’s a maniac at the door; and the Devil is surely a maniacal and cunning opponent.

One of the key elements in any battle is understanding the strategy and tactics of your opponent. In the spiritual battle of life, we need to develop some sophistication in recognizing, naming, and understanding the strategies and common tactics of the Devil.

A 2011 book by Fr. Louis J. Cameli, The Devil You Don’t Know, can be of great assistance in this matter. In the book, Fr. Cameli breaks the Devil’s tactics down into four broad categories. I highly recommend reading the book, where Fr. Cameli expounds on the topic much more fully than I can do here.

While the categorization comes from Fr. Cameli, the reflections that follow are largely my own, although surely rooted in his excellent work.

I. Deception – Jesus says, The Devil was a murderer from the beginning he does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies he speaks according to his own nature, he is a liar and the father of lies (John 8:44).

The Devil attempts to deceive us with many false and empty promises. Most of these center around the lie that we will be happier and more fulfilled if we sin or deny aspects of the truth. Whatever passing pleasures come with sin, they are just that—passing. Great, accumulated suffering eventually comes with almost all sinful activity. Yet, despite this experience, we human beings remain very gullible; we seem to love empty promises and put all sorts of false hopes in them.

The Devil also tries to deceives us by suggesting that we introduce all sorts of complexities into our thinking. He seeks to confuse us and to conceal the fundamental truth about our action from us. Our minds are very wily; we love to indulge complexity as a way of avoiding the truth and/or making excuses. Conniving with the Devil, we entertain endless complications in our minds by asking “But what if this?” or “What about that?” Along with the Devil, we project all sorts of possible difficulties, exceptions, or potential sob stories, in order to avoid insisting that we (and/or others) behave well and live according to the truth.

The Devil also seeks to deceive us with “wordsmithing.” The dismemberment and murder of a child through abortion becomes “reproductive freedom” or “choice.” Engaging in sodomy is called being “gay” (a word which used to mean happy). Our luminous Faith and ancient wisdom is called “darkness” and “ignorance.” Fornication is called “cohabitation.”  The redefinition of marriage as it has been known for some 5000 years, is labeled “marriage equality.”  And thus through exaggerations and outright false labeling, the Devil deceives us. We too easily connive by calling “good,” or “no big deal,” what God calls sinful.

Finally, the Devil deceives us through the sheer volume of information and with selective use of it. Information is not the same is truth, and data can be assembled very craftily in order to make deceptive points. Further, certain facts and figures can be emphasized while other balancing truths are omitted. And thus even information that is true in itself can become a means of deception. The news media and other sources sometimes exercise their greatest influence in what they choose not to report.

We do well to assess very carefully the many ways Satan seeks to deceive us. Do not believe everything you think or hear. While we ought not to be cynical, we should be sober, seeking to verify what we see and hear and square it with God’s revealed truth.

II. Division – One of Jesus’ final prayers for us was that we would be one (cf John 17:22). He prayed this at the Last Supper, just before He went out to suffer and die for us. This highlights that a chief aspect of His work on the cross was to overcome the divisions intensified by Satan. Some argue that the Greek root of the word “diabolical” (diabolein) means to cut, tear, or divide. Jesus prays and works to reunify what the Devil divides.

The Devil’s work of division starts within each one of us, as we experience many contrary drives: some noble, creative, and edifying; others base, sinful, and destructive. So often, we struggle within and feel torn apart, much as St. Paul describes in Romans chapter 7:  The good that I want to do, I do not do …, and when I try to do good, evil is at hand. This is the work of the Devil, to divide us within. And as St. Paul lays out in Romans chapter 8, the chief work of the Lord is to establish within us the unity of soul and body, in accordance with the unity of His truth.

The Devil’s attack against our inner unity of course spills out into many divisions among us externally. So many things help to drive this division and the Devil surely taps into them all: anger, resentment, fear, misunderstanding, greed, pride, and arrogance. There is also the impatience that we so easily develop with those we love, as well as the flawed notion that we should seek out other more perfect and desirable people instead. This leads many to abandon their marriages, family, churches, and communities; always in search of the elusive goal of finding better, more perfect people and situations.

Yes, the Devil has a real field day tapping in to a plethora of sinful drives within us. His goal is always to divide us within and to divide us among ourselves. We do well to recognize that regardless of our struggles with others, we all share a common enemy who seeks to divide and destroy us. St. Paul writes, For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms (Eph 6:12). Yes, feuding brothers reconcile when there’s a maniac at the door. Step one is to notice the maniac and step two is to set aside our lesser divisions.

III. Diversion – For all of us, our most critical focus is God and the good things awaiting us in Heaven. Faith, obedience to the truth, love of God, and love of neighbor lead us on the path toward Heaven. The Devil does all that he can to divert us away from our one true goal.

Perhaps he will do this by making us overly absorbed in the passing things of this world. So many people claim that they are too busy to pray, attend Mass, or seek other forms of spiritual nourishment. They become absorbed in worldly things, which pass, ignoring the lasting reality that looms.

Anxieties and fears also cause us to be distracted. The Devil causes us to fixate on fears about passing things while neglecting to have a proper fear of the judgment that awaits us. Jesus says, Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell (Matt 10:28). In other words, we should have a holy reverence and fear directed towards the Lord. If we do this, many of our other fears will be put into better perspective or will go away altogether. In this matter of fear, the Devil says just the opposite: we should fear the myriad things that might afflict us in this passing world and not think at all about the most significant thing that awaits us—our judgment.

At the heart of all diversion is the fact that the Devil wants us to focus on lesser things so that we avoid focusing on greater things, such as making moral decisions and attending to the proper overall direction of our life.

We must learn to focus on what matters most and decisively refuse to be diverted by lesser things.

IV. Discouragement – As human beings, and certainly as Christians, we ought to have high aspirations; this is good. But as with all good things, Satan often seeks to poison them. With our high aspirations, sometimes we lack the humility to recognize that we must make a journey in order to achieve that which is good or best. Too easily, Satan tempts us to impatience with our own self or with others. Expecting to achieve our aspirations unreasonably quickly, we can be uncharitable toward our own self or others. Some grow discouraged with themselves or with others and just give up on the pursuit of holiness. Others give up on the Church because of the imperfections found there, as are found in any institution with humans.

The Devil discourages us with open-ended aspirations. There is always room for improvement; we can always do more. When we can always do more, it is easy to think that we’ve never done enough. And thus the Devil discourages us, sowing thoughts of unreasonable demands within us about we can or should be able to achieve each day.

The Devil also discourages us through simple things like fatigue, minor personal failings, setbacks, and other obstacles that are common to our human condition living in a fallen world with limited resources.

In all these ways the Devil seeks to discourage us, to make us want to give up. Only a properly developed sense of humility can save us from this discouragement by Satan. Humility—which is reverence for the truth about ourselves—teaches us that we grow slowly and in stages and helps us to recognize that we will always have setbacks and that we live in a world that is hard and far from perfect. With humility we can learn to lean more on the Lord and trust in His providential help, which grows in us incrementally.

Here, then, are four common tactics of the Devil. Learn to recognize and name them. In this way, we can start to gain authority over them. Consider reading Fr. Cameli’s book to learn more.

We were blessed this past weekend to have Sherry Weddell, author of Forming Intentional Disciples, visit the Archdiocese of Washington and speak to priests and lay leaders. Her work is a great blessing to the Church in calling us back to “job one,” which is to make disciples. In Catholic parishes evangelization is too often relegated to committees or tossed into the “we’ll get to that next year” file. Weddell’s mission is to create greater urgency in this most central work of the Church.

Rather than present her thoughts (which are admirably stated in her books) in this blog, I would like instead to put forth a few of my own (which echo hers, and I would argue, those of Jesus Himself). Sadly, there are many issues that keep people from experiencing Jesus powerfully in our parishes. There are also some practices we ought to better observe in order to better manifest the presence and person of Jesus. Let’s consider first some problems and then some remedial practices.

I. Problems – If Jesus is present in His Church, then this is most evident in His action and presence in the Liturgy and Sacraments of the Church. Yet any cursory look into the typical Catholic parish would reveal little to indicate an awareness of this.

A. Bored and disengaged – The assembled people, including the clergy, often look bored, distracted, and mildly irritated at having to endure the event. Where is the alert joy that one sees at sporting events or at the appearances of celebrities? If people believe that Jesus is alive and ministering in this moment, why do so many of them look as if they’re waiting for a root canal? It’s as though they wish the whole thing would be over as quickly and painlessly as possible.

Some argue that many people are just reserved by nature, but most of these same people are animated enough at football games or in political discussions. The answer seems to be more due to a lack of vivid faith and a failure to understand that the Liturgy and Sacraments are encounters with the Risen Lord Jesus.

B. Perfunctory – Further, in terms of the spiritual life of many of the faithful, it seems that even where there is observance of norms (e.g., attendance at Sunday Mass, or confession on at least an annual basis), it is done more out of a sense of duty than with eager love. The bare minimum is all that is done, only enough to “check off the God box.” It is almost as though they are placating the deity rather than worshipping and praising the God to whom they are grateful and whom they love. The upshot is that the sacraments are considered tedious rituals rather than transformative realities or true encounters with Jesus.

C. Low Expectations – Many people place more trust in Tylenol than they do in the Eucharist. When they take Tylenol they expect something to happen; they expect there to be healing, for the pain to go away or the swelling to go down. But do these same people have any real expectations about the Eucharist or the other sacraments? Almost never.

Much of the blame for these low expectations lies with priests and catechists who have never really taught the faithful to expect much. At best there are vague bromides about “being fed.” Little is taught about radical transformation and healing.

D. Unevangelized – The general result is that many in the pews have received the sacraments, but have not been evangelized. Many have gone through Catholic rites of passage but have never really met Jesus. They have gone through the motions for years but are not really getting anywhere when it comes to being in a life-changing, transformative relationship with Jesus Christ. To a large degree, the Lord is a stranger to them. They are far from the normal Christian life of being in personal, living, and conscious contact with the Lord.
Given these common problems, what are we to do?

II. Principles and Practices

A. Clarity as to the fundamental goal of the Church – The fundamental mission of the Church is to go to all the nations, teach them what the Lord commands, and make disciples of them through Baptism and the other sacraments (cf Matt 28:20).

But making disciples and being disciples is about more than just “membership.” To become a true disciple is to have a personal, life-changing, transformative relationship with Jesus Christ. It is to witness to the power of the cross to put sin to death, to bring every grace alive, and to make of us a new creation in Christ. We cannot and should not reduce discipleship to mere membership.
The goal is to connect people with the Lord Jesus Christ so that He can save them and transform their lives in radical and powerful ways.

B. Conviction in Preaching – Those who preach, teach, and witness to others cannot simply be content to pass on formulas or to merely quote others. Priests, parents, catechists, and others must begin to be firsthand witnesses to the power of God’s Word, not only to inform, but to perform, and to transform. They must bear witness to how the Lord is doing this in their own lives.

If they are in touch with God, they ought to exhibit joy, conviction, and real change. They must be able to preach and teach with “authority,” in the richer Greek sense of the word. Exousia (authority) means more literally to preach “out of one’s own substance.” The summons is to speak from one’s own experience as a firsthand witness who can say with conviction, “Everything the Church and Scriptures have always announced is true, because in the laboratory of my own life I have tested them and found them to be true and transformative. I who speak these things to you, along with every saint, swear to you that they are true and trustworthy.”

A firsthand witness knows what he saying; he does not merely know about it. The video below from Fr. Francis Martin speaks to this practice. Preaching, teaching, and witnessing with conviction are essential components of renewal in the Church.

C. Cultivate Expectation! – Most people expect to meet, and have met, people who have changed their lives, and yet they don’t expect much from their relationship with Jesus Christ.

If ordinary people can change our lives, then why can’t the Lord Jesus Christ? Most people seem to think that having a tepid spiritual life, experiencing spiritual boredom, and having only a vague notion about the truths of faith are all normal. Really? Is that the best that the death of the Son of God can do for us? That we should be bored, lukewarm, uncertain, and mildly depressed? Of course not!

We need to lay hold of the glorious life that Jesus died to give us, to have high expectations, and to start watching our lives be transformed.

Consider the woman who came up to Jesus in the crowd thinking that if she just touched the hem of His garment she would get well. Jesus was amazed that one woman among the large crowd had actually touched Him. After she explained He said to her, “Your faith has healed you” (Luke 8:47). Who has such faith? Who has the expectation to be healed, to be delivered? King Jesus is a-listenin’ all day long!

D. Catechetical refocus – We have tended to teach the faith more as an academic subject than as a relationship. And hence we have focused on and measure success based on whether we can do things like list the seven gifts of the Spirit or the four marks of the Church. Certainly there is content that must be mastered, but without relationship to Jesus, most people lose command of the facts shortly after the test.
We need to begin with relationship. We need to get people (children and adults) excited about Jesus and joyful about what He has done. Then the motivation to learn will come naturally.

Back in the late 1960s I became a fan of Star Trek. Captain James Tiberius Kirk was all the world to me. Even though he was a fictional character, I wanted to know all about him: where he was born, what he did, and what he thought. When I discovered the actor who played Kirk, I joined the William Shatner fan club. Then I wanted to know all about Shatner: what he thought about important issues, when he was born, and what his favorite hobbies were. Fascination drew me to a mastery of all sorts of facts about Captain Kirk and William Shatner. You didn’t have to make me learn this stuff; I sought it out eagerly!

Do people think this way about Jesus? Usually not. And why not? Because we do very little to cultivate this fascination and joy. We teach more about structures, rules, and distinctions than about Jesus. Although our intellectual tradition is important and essential, without starting from a relational interest, we might as well be attempting to build on no foundation at all.

Jesus said, “Come and see” as an initiation. The details of the creed came later and were important, but relationship was first. Friendship precedes all the facts; they can come later.

Where in our catechism do we inculcate a love for, respect of, and fascination with Jesus?

E. Come on, Testify! – Catholics are terrible at testimony and witness. What is your story? How did you meet Jesus? What has He done in your life? What is He doing in your life now? Have your children ever heard you say that you love Jesus? Do they know what He has done for you? Do parishioners ever hear their priests testify? Arguments and proof have their place, but without personal testimony and conviction, these truths remain abstractions.
There may come a time when, through argument, you are actually get someone to “buy in.” But then comes the tough question: “Well, that’s all good news, but how do I know it’s true?” And that is when you have to be able to answer, convincingly, “Look at me!” It’s not enough to state the facts and to quote others. You have to know what you’re talking about, and relate it personally and convincingly to others.

The bottom line is that we have to be converted, and having experienced conversion, go forth as those who know the Lord, not just know about Him.

I was happy to hear that the Vatican recently reminded the world’s Catholics of some important matters concerning cremation. As cremation has become more common in recent decades, many significant problems have emerged.

1. Cremated remains not being buried or placed in a mausoleum,
2. Cremated remains being scattered,
3. Cremated remains being divvied up among relatives,
4. And strangest of all, cremated remains being fashioned into or incorporated within jewelry.

Cremated remains should be treated with the same respect and reverence as bodily remains. For indeed cremated remains are in fact what does remain of the body. While many people refer to them merely as “ashes,” they are remains of a human body and should be treated as such.

Notably, the new instructions reiterate the consistent norms of the Church in the following ways:

1. Cremated remains, must be laid to rest in a sacred place, that is, in a cemetery or, in certain cases, in a church or an area, which has been set aside for this purpose, and so dedicated by the competent ecclesial authority.
2. With rare exceptions requiring the permission of the bishop, the conservation of the ashes of the departed in a domestic residence is not permitted.
3. It is not permitted to scatter the ashes of the faithful departed in the air, on land, at sea, or in some other way, nor may they be preserved in mementos, pieces of jewelry or other objects.

Grateful though I am for these reminders, I know that the Church too often begins to permit once-forbidden things (things forbidden for many good reasons) without providing a real pastoral plan that both sets limits and educates God’s people. And while our norms are published in various liturgical books, most people don’t read liturgical books let alone the norms that are tucked away in the introduction and instructions. All they hear is that something that used to be forbidden is now allowed. This can lead to abuses cropping up that get overlooked by weary or obsequious clergy and norms being are unevenly enforced from parish to parish. A pastoral plan needs to be diocesan and nationwide.

As a pastor, I think that some of the following things will be helpful going forward:

1. Bishops should ensure that clergy are properly instructed in the norms and then insist that those norms are enforced and the faithful are educated.
2. Dioceses should consider enacting a policy requiring parishes to ensure that proper interment of cremated remains is arranged before the celebration of the funeral Mass.
3. Catholic cemeteries should consider “amnesty” offers, wherein inexpensive communal burial sites are made available for the interment of cremated remains for families that might have trouble affording a private niche or gravesite. Many families have kept cremated remains on mantles or in closets for years. Even if they know they should provide a decent burial for these remains, some resist due to the cost. We can work with them to end this problem. My own parish owns several burial sites at a local Catholic cemetery and I am pursuing an arrangement to offer at least one of them for this very purpose. In the Archdiocese of Washington, our cemeteries offer space for cremated remains. We have also begun offer burial space for miscarried infants.

The bottom line is that these norms need a national and diocesan focus as well as enforcement. Leaving it all up to the individual parishes leads to uneven practices that confuse the faithful and cause factions to develop. A pastoral plan is necessary both at the level of the local bishop and the Bishop’s Conference. Otherwise, I am convinced that abuses (intentional or not) will continue.

I have published a flyer on this subject (for use in my own parish) that you might find helpful (Considering Cremation?).